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This was the question I asked myself this morning.

I woke feeling disgruntled. The sound I’d make if I let myself (or it satisfied) would be a growl. Or a groan. Pretty primitive. I’m fed up with trying – to find solutions for my embodied discomfort – so I turn, once again to my paints. It didn’t start well. It was boring, ordinary (3 dark blue circles) and I could feel my desire growing for something new with each circle. I branch out – 3 pale blue ones…
Part of me thinks I want steady/ ordinary and there’s another part – shouting loudly – how can you be soo boring – shove up, let me take the brush. And there I am, rebelling with my own paints. Making messy circles, enjoying how each one is going to be different because I’m not ‘controlling’ the colour. Eventually I go full circle – oh these puns – forgive me! And I finish with 5 small lime green dots – because it wasn’t finished till I’d done them.
How do I know when it’s finished? When it’s ‘enough’ for me? It’s a felt experience – only I know. This is my way of giving voice and expression to who I am at this moment – and a good starting point. I’ve upped my engagement with my day – thank goodness. (Huge yawn – energy moving).
This is energy work – finding ways to self soothe in a way that’s utterly personal and satisfying. And inexpensive – thank the Lord!
If you’d like to explore what works for you – get in touch. It could be something simple.

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